The Least of These

Several weeks ago I spent the weekend at Youth Haven Ranch. (Youth Haven is a camp for underprivileged kids who come from abusive or needy homes.) I was there to train to become a Leader in Training (LIT), but it was only because my mom signed me up. I was okay with the idea, I knew it would be a good experience and only that. Boy, was I ever wrong.

To become an official LIT, one has to do a week of training and then three more observational weekends. I thought, once I arrived there Friday evening, that since this was only going to be a good experience, I would not be coming back to finish the training. I was wrong again.

God's always right. And His plans are always perfect, and often contradictory to what we might think. He sure showed me that at Youth Haven. Friday evening through Saturday afternoon, I was so convinced that this was not the place for me. (I also was counting the hours until the end of camp that weekend.) It wasn't all that bad, but I just didn't feel very comfortable, and it was tiring! I had expected to commit myself to loving these love-starved kids, but they require more work than I ever dreamed of!

Then Saturday afternoon gym time came, and I had four little girls clinging to me, practically tearing my limbs off in admiration and I just suddenly loved them. Not because I knew it was the right thing to do, but because I finally let Jesus be the reason I was loving them. I loved them because they needed to be shown a true love that lasts. And it broke my heart to see them so desperate for love they should have.

During Sunday chapel, some of the kids were sharing what they had learned about Jesus at Youth Haven. One recurring answer was this: "Jesus died for my sins so that I can be with Him, and He'll always be with me no matter what."That's when I realized that when Jesus said, "Let the little children come to Me, for the Kingdom of Heaven belongs to such as these," He meant these children. These children who simply put their whole trust in Jesus, not because it was the right thing to do--most did not hear of Jesus at home--but because they needed Him to love them, and they knew He could and would. It was a simple trust that grabbed ahold of my heart and showed me that faith should be like that of a child.

I ended up loving those kids so much it hurt to send them back to their homes at the end of camp. When I returned home myself, I knew something was different. I knew I had changed, to the point where I almost felt as if I did not belong at home anymore. I realized that something was missing from me, and I knew what it was. I left my heart behind at Youth Haven.

I will be going back to finish my training, Lord willing, and then work there this summer.